Monday, March 26, 2007
truth in song form
Yet I have a hard time remembering all the things that I should remember. And a hard time forgetting the all things that I am supposed forget
- mewithoutyou - carousels
- mewithoutyou - carousels
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Friday, March 23, 2007
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Sunday, March 18, 2007
JET LAAAAAAG!!!!
Iv had the same feeling in the pit of my stomach literally 24/7 for the last 2 weeks.
I dont know if its the good anxious or the bad anxious. or maybe my stomach knows in advance that my socks are going to get blown off to the moon and my head just doesnt realize it yet.
This whole thing is so surreal I cant belive im actually leaving in 10 days. leaving everything i know and everything im comfortable with behind and jumping head first into a world i know nothing about with no one i know around me. and its kind of exciting.
Although, Im not sure how im supposed to feel about a certain person having an intrest in being with me only because im leaving, they never made an effort before when they should have. even this effort is a pretty sad attempt. theyve had forever to try to get to know me. why awkwardly rob me of my few days left in Canada with sad attempts to bond?
*sigh*
I dont know what to do with myself. im more stressed out then iv ever been in my entire existance of living and its awesome
I dont know if its the good anxious or the bad anxious. or maybe my stomach knows in advance that my socks are going to get blown off to the moon and my head just doesnt realize it yet.
This whole thing is so surreal I cant belive im actually leaving in 10 days. leaving everything i know and everything im comfortable with behind and jumping head first into a world i know nothing about with no one i know around me. and its kind of exciting.
Although, Im not sure how im supposed to feel about a certain person having an intrest in being with me only because im leaving, they never made an effort before when they should have. even this effort is a pretty sad attempt. theyve had forever to try to get to know me. why awkwardly rob me of my few days left in Canada with sad attempts to bond?
*sigh*
I dont know what to do with myself. im more stressed out then iv ever been in my entire existance of living and its awesome
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
2 weeks left ( 15 days )
So...I leave on the 28th.
If anyones intrested I leave at 9:10 am on march 28th. from the saskatoon airport. and get back 4:20 * snicker * ( or something ) on september 5th
See the thing is. Im done work on friday, so that leaves the remainder of the time for me to get my crapola together and visit people I wont see in a while . And generally most of these days are already booked with my last shinanigans with friends before I go away ( expecially the weekends ). So, if you guys want. make your reservations with me now. haha
but seriously. Leave a comment on which day/time works best for you and ill fit you in hopefully, or even call me if you wish.
I want to see everyone. i repeat EVERYONE before I go. so if you read this PLEASE comment if you want to hang out before I leave for Oz, mmKAY!?
If anyones intrested I leave at 9:10 am on march 28th. from the saskatoon airport. and get back 4:20 * snicker * ( or something ) on september 5th
See the thing is. Im done work on friday, so that leaves the remainder of the time for me to get my crapola together and visit people I wont see in a while . And generally most of these days are already booked with my last shinanigans with friends before I go away ( expecially the weekends ). So, if you guys want. make your reservations with me now. haha
but seriously. Leave a comment on which day/time works best for you and ill fit you in hopefully, or even call me if you wish.
I want to see everyone. i repeat EVERYONE before I go. so if you read this PLEASE comment if you want to hang out before I leave for Oz, mmKAY!?
Sunday, March 11, 2007
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
mewithoutYou > Connor Oberst ( im sorry )
Raaaah i know these are song lyrics. but for real. They are the best song lyrics iv ever heard EVER.
Not one motion of her gesture could I forget
The prettiest bag lady I ever met
Pushing her cart in the rain
Then gathering plastic and glass
She watched the day pass
Not hour by hour
But pain by pain
If I was a basket filled with holes
Then she was the sand I tried to hold
And ran out behind me
As I swung with some invisible hands
I stopped believing, you start to move
She was like wine turned to water then turned back to wine
I stopped my leaving and the better man bloomed
And you can pour us out and we won't mind
I was dead, then alive
She was like wine turned to water and turned back to wine
You can pour us out, we won't mind
A scratch around the mouth of the glass
My life is no longer mine
If you're still looking for a blanket
Sweetie, I'm sorry, I'm no sort of fabric
But if you need a tailor
Then take your torn shirt, and stumble up my stairs
And mumble your pitiful prayers
And in your tangled night's sleep, our midnight needles go to work
Until all comfort and fear flows in one river
Down on the shelf by the mirror where you see yourself whole
And it makes you shiver
Our lives are not our own
Even the wind lays still
All I felt was fire and cold
And movement, movement
If they ask you for a sign of the Father
Tell them it's movement, movement and repose
Not one motion of her gesture could I forget
The prettiest bag lady I ever met
Pushing her cart in the rain
Then gathering plastic and glass
She watched the day pass
Not hour by hour
But pain by pain
If I was a basket filled with holes
Then she was the sand I tried to hold
And ran out behind me
As I swung with some invisible hands
I stopped believing, you start to move
She was like wine turned to water then turned back to wine
I stopped my leaving and the better man bloomed
And you can pour us out and we won't mind
I was dead, then alive
She was like wine turned to water and turned back to wine
You can pour us out, we won't mind
A scratch around the mouth of the glass
My life is no longer mine
If you're still looking for a blanket
Sweetie, I'm sorry, I'm no sort of fabric
But if you need a tailor
Then take your torn shirt, and stumble up my stairs
And mumble your pitiful prayers
And in your tangled night's sleep, our midnight needles go to work
Until all comfort and fear flows in one river
Down on the shelf by the mirror where you see yourself whole
And it makes you shiver
Our lives are not our own
Even the wind lays still
All I felt was fire and cold
And movement, movement
If they ask you for a sign of the Father
Tell them it's movement, movement and repose
Sunday, March 04, 2007
Where everything was beautiful and nothing hurt
I was alive like this once. belive it or not, and now times turned me into something dead and unsatisfying like wine turned into water.
I long for that freedom and ignorance again. And not the bad kind of ignorance either. It was a beautiful thing.
And so you'll be to me. My memories of childhood, When I was once free
I long for that freedom and ignorance again. And not the bad kind of ignorance either. It was a beautiful thing.
And so you'll be to me. My memories of childhood, When I was once free
Friday, March 02, 2007
3, 2, 1 liftoff..... In 35 days.
Im sick and im tired. Literally.
Im sick and im tired. Figurativly
Im sick and tired of this painfully slow and at the same time ultra hyper-speed waiting game that leaves my stomach doing triple backflips whenever the thought of leaving crosses my mind. Or is it the thought of NOT leaving. Probably.
Im just about ready to leave this snowy unwonderland and go to my paradise forever. no strings attached. I want to arrive in my plane, get over jet lag and give my stomach a rest and sleep easy knowing im finally there. I just want everything to be taken care of well before I leave.
I did get my passport in the mail today. which I wasnt expecting.
Somehow I cant shake a phrase Les once said to me from my mind, Theres probably a reason for that....
And I know your all probably thinking " OH steph! at least you get to go!" But you get a little impatient when you've been waiting over a year for where your going to be in a little over a month ( hopefully ) And its expecially stressful because you didnt get to go last time.
On another note. Isnt it awesome I only get 1/2 hour to myself today which will be spent packing for a youth retreat at camp Kadesh this weekend? Yee hoo. Did someone say only female sponsor!?
Thats ok though. Im actually kind of looking forward to it. I might be able to polish up on my "photography skillz" and all you more than patient people will finally get to see some new stuff from me.
Besides. Those kids can be fun.
Im sick and im tired. Figurativly
Im sick and tired of this painfully slow and at the same time ultra hyper-speed waiting game that leaves my stomach doing triple backflips whenever the thought of leaving crosses my mind. Or is it the thought of NOT leaving. Probably.
Im just about ready to leave this snowy unwonderland and go to my paradise forever. no strings attached. I want to arrive in my plane, get over jet lag and give my stomach a rest and sleep easy knowing im finally there. I just want everything to be taken care of well before I leave.
I did get my passport in the mail today. which I wasnt expecting.
Somehow I cant shake a phrase Les once said to me from my mind, Theres probably a reason for that....
And I know your all probably thinking " OH steph! at least you get to go!" But you get a little impatient when you've been waiting over a year for where your going to be in a little over a month ( hopefully ) And its expecially stressful because you didnt get to go last time.
On another note. Isnt it awesome I only get 1/2 hour to myself today which will be spent packing for a youth retreat at camp Kadesh this weekend? Yee hoo. Did someone say only female sponsor!?
Thats ok though. Im actually kind of looking forward to it. I might be able to polish up on my "photography skillz" and all you more than patient people will finally get to see some new stuff from me.
Besides. Those kids can be fun.
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