I bet you build me up this high just so i can crash a little harder

I had another bad day so yes the title applys

wow. whenever school nears my days start flopping
For the past 2 days everyones been acting weird to me and mistakes from last year have come backto bite me in the face. And the worst part is i could have avoided it if i put in a freaking Smidgen of effort.

It seems like I get put on this high. A long stream of good days. I feel as if everyones watching me climb up my little happiness ladder while they chuckle to themselves and play rock paper scissors to decide whos turn it is to run over and push me down leaving me back where i started in this first place.

This times diffrent. It feels like when I fell I broke both my legs

For once id like to stay up there on my own happiness ladder.I have way too many things to worry about lately and its stressing me out to huge degrees But i guess troubles and junk is what makes us human right?....right?

I guess today wasnt ALL bad. we had a gym blast at our school and corwin came and did it so that was sweet. Our group was the smallest and we still won. Woot!


anyways,... photography


This is that same truck that I took the picture of the broken glass a couple posts back

Waking life

This is a quote in the movie waking life. Pay attention now, You kind of have to think

(Main character walking down the street with a man who is holding a can of gasoline).

The self-destructive man feels completely alienated, utterly alone.
He's an outsider to the human community.
He thinks to himself, "I must be insane."
What he fails to realize is that society has, just as he does, a vested interest in considerable losses, in catastrophes.
These wars, famines, floods and quakes meet well defined needs.
Man wants chaos. In fact, he's got to have it.
Depressions, strife, riots, murder, all this dread.
We're irresistibly drawn to that almost orgiastic state created out of death and destruction.
It's in all of us. We revel in it. Sure, the media tries to put a sad face on these things, painting them up as great human tragedies, but we all know the function of the media has never been to eliminate the evils of the world.
No! Their job is to persuade us to accept those evils and get used to living with them.
The powers that be want us to be passive observers.
And they haven't given us any other options outside the occasional purely symbolic participatory act of voting.
You want the puppet on the right or the puppet on the left?
I feel the time has come to project my own inadequacies and dissatisfactions into the socio-political and scientific schemes.
Let my own lack of a voice be heard.

(He pours gasoline all over himself and lights himself on fire.)


An intensely great quote. I love this movie, Seriosly. everyone go out and rent it or something right now.

So that post was totaly pointless. So ill leave off with another photography thing

A no tresspassing sign by the railroad tracks

This pain has made it hard to breath...

As you probably can tell by now. my titles have nothing to do with the actual post and are lines from songs i like and dont mean anything unless you pick it apart and be all intellectual. So chances are if theres a relation i didnt mean for it. But if there is ill probably explain it

Anyways, i don't understand why people are so vocal about slagging off one another because they are into something that you're not, i'm speaking more from a musical viewpoint more than anything.
If we can appreciate our diversity in our race, colour, etc and clearly can see that no two people are the same why then are we so close minded?
I hate it when people bash a type of music because its something they dont normally listen to and then refuse to listen to it. If you dont like it. thats fine, just dont generalise everything.
The principals are the same, why can't we just appreciate something for what it is?
I'm not even going to try to apply this to anything outside of music because it gets so complicated there, but i will say this...
In an effort to form an opinion on big matters are we ever going to know the absolute truth about things unless you know what's going on firsthand?
Even then does that justify that your reasoning is right?
Maybe i should stop there before i start getting into stuff i don't know anything about...


Anyways. Photography of the day...my old guitar against my amp. Horrah...

Good News For People Who Love Bad News.

I'm a nice girl. A good girl. A caring for strangers girl.
I can take a lot of crap from a lot of people a lot of the time. But in the month of September and october, I expect the crap to go my way. Just for those months, I demand that people think only of me.
Even people I don't know and people I will never know. Is it fair? Is it reasonable? Ask me in September or october, and I'll tell you that you should shut up directly and think thrice before asking me such insane questions.
Ill tolerate Halloween only because its older than me, its at the end of the month, and sometimes I'm up for a haunted house or two (which, I suspect, were created solely for my personal satisfaction. You guys can thank me for haunted houses anytime, though. You don't have to wait until October.)
But like Halloween has delicious candy, Thanksgiving has delicious everything. So ill tolerate that as well ( thanksgivings in october right?)
I expect the skies to be clear, unless I'm in the mood for cloudy weather
I expect never to run out of gasoline, to magically find money in my pockets, and for my hair to always look delicious, yes, delicious, without having to do anything to it.
I expect to get smarter without trying and I expect to have any number of small good things happen to me - just because!


Haha...yeah right. Man wouldnt life be sweet if it ran like that though. But seriosly I have been taking alot of crap from people lately. But i dont expect any of the above to happen although that would be pretty sweet.

Anyways. You might be asking yourself. hey steph. Why the two posts in one day? To that , this is my reply. Because i have no life.

Me and Stacey went into starbucks this evening after me and my dad went in this afternoon. to complete the number of 3 starbucks coffee's for me today.
I had a caramel frappacino, caramel machiattio, and and iced caramel machiatto.... lol. i decided to try every caramel thing there.
Anywho. as me and stacey were sitting there. This guy turns to us and says. Hey girls. wanna watch my coffee i forgot to lock up my bike.
We said sure and just sat there doing nothing. And he comes back says thanks not knowing we didnt do anything.
So a few minutes later he turns to us and says. "Hey do you girls wanna go see my dads car ( this guys like 45 by the way )
So by now me and stacey are pretty freaked out as he reaches into his back pocket.
To our relife he pulls out a picture of it. and hands it to us. and says all this junk about cars that i dont understand.
When hes done rambling i shoot a glance at stacey and say. hey....its about time to go lets just drive around ok bye. And ran.
kind...of frightening

Yep... old men DO scare me.

Heres another photography of the day...because im bored

its jess by the old beer gardens at the baseball diamonds

If you've lost your faith in love and music the end wont be long...

Ahhh....Back from camp.

It was a tough week but tons of fun. God stretched me in a few ways.

Having Carrie Katie Jaclynne and Ness in my cabin was really good. those girls are so much fun. they were really outgoing which made it super fun.
Me and carrie kind of had a little war going on with laurels cabin. lol there cabin cheer was
"we are sandpiper
we dont wear diapers
we all drive vipers
we are sandpiper"
So we made a cheer to say back to them and it went like this
"Hey sandpiper,
We dont see your vipers
But we sure see your diapers
OOOOH SNAP!"
Haha...yeah were cool. admit it

I miss everyone so much. Im actually gonna try keeping up some camp relationships and call people this time to do something cause it sucked last year when i didnt.

One good thing about camp too. I was not craving music as much as i did before. Because for some reason they put me in mountain biking again. And we just sent the kids out on scavenger hunts and stuff because we were lazy and zach was in the shop always playing awesome music. so that was a huge relife.

So school starts on wensday.....boo and yay.
Lots of people are saying it was their best year and it went by really fast. so I hope thats true.
Last first day of school ever. Got all my supplys. So I hope it goes just as fast as the summer did

Haha. while getting my school supplys. I had such a craving for starbucks the whole week so i went in this afternoon and got 2... just for me. haha. im so unhealthy

and for the last random comment of the day. I really wanna go to the underoath concert. Does anyone want to come with me? I was gonna go with laurel but i dont know how im gonna meet up with her. So if anyone wants to come tell me

Quote of the week:

What the duece!?


Photography of the day


Its Carrie!... on...leopky! ....hoorah

I need to keep spinning.im practicing for the ch-maj-pionships
-Andrew Kessler


NOOOOOO! i honestly wrote up EVERYTHING and my internet deicded to turn off for no reason whatsoever...so this is a very condensed version of what i wrote
I might elaborate later if anyone is intrested


Redberry staff windup

lots of food

Bonfire. dug a hole and lit it on fire. dug a trench, set that on fire. flung flaming peices of sand around ( note: all done by zach carsten and ryan... not me lol )

Hottub

Hung out for 3 hours in a cabin with Andrew Teri Steven and Eric lol. where it was halarious because andrew was half asleep and making no sense if his life depended on it. I also learned alot about girls...from a guy , lol weird

Attempted to watch the sunrise with zach, steph, teri, and...other people who i cant remeber their names. gave up and went inside for a bit

Finished watching the sunrise with Zach and Steph and Teri

Complained of how tired and hungry we were until we all left

But heres a glimpse into the halarity. dun dun dun dun.....QUOTES!


Andrew- Which way do i spin better guys?Left or right?
Steven- Uh...left
Andrew- OK! *spins around*

I gotta keep spinning im practicing for the chmajpionchips
- Andrew

All you haveta do to figure out the magority. is figure out the minority
- Andrew

Ugh, im giving birth to a pig and it coming out my belly button
- Steph ( no not me )

Man, i thought there was a man with a beard staring at us through the window, Then i realized it was a curtain
- Me

Steven - Try spinning left and right at the same time
Andrew- Thats too hard!

If I had a stick. I would SO be poking that fire right now
- Me

Marlen *shouts from pool because they were uhm...mini nipping.. i guess* GIRLS! stay in your cabin!
Steven- ....ok!



ok...thats quite enough. lol see you in a week.

Me and carrie are definatly in a cabin with ness jaclynne and katie. its going to be a BLAST!



Zach... i still have a craving for mennonite sausage, perogies and BBQ'd corn on the cob. Thats gonna last for months. *grumbles*

Two of us, Flipping through a thrift store magazine. It's Indie rock'n'roll for me...

So my big news is I didn't even get to ride with no seatbelts...not even in the motor home! I was so mad.
I had to go with my brother because there were too many flowers in the back and I came home early because the reception was a gong show.
The groom and the best man were wasted by 8 and I had to take care of their kid the whole time and during the span of like..an hour and he puked on me twice. It was nice, I love smelling like rotting milk
*everyone take a note of that for future referance*

But yeah, I don't want kids.
Honestly.
There not all cute bowls of sugar and candy all the time. Oh no.

More often than not they are not-very-cute bowls of puke and poop with a lot of grumpiness
sprinkled all over the top.

I dont think i could take a kid crying and grunting all the time because you dont know what the heck they want.
And as they try to communicate with gurgles and screams they are puking and all that jazz for however long until it takes them to learn how to walk and talk.

Thats when the terror begins.
Screaming machines that have no decrease in energy.
They go everywhere they arent supposed to go and you have to be chasing after them before they crack there heads open on something.
*takes a breath*

I like other peoples kids. As long as I dont have to take care of them or take them home.

Anyways. Heres the comic of the day and (2) photos of the day cause i missed last time



















These were both taken at that freaky gas station i mentioned...a long time ago across the railroad tracks in Dalmeny

Is this what they call love on a saturday night?...


Poop.
Redberry called me back and they have no room for me.
Oh well.
Im kind of excited for this wedding tomorow, I get to ride there in a motorhome . I've always wanted to drive somewhere and sit at a table at the same time without the restraints of a seatbelt.

Anywho CARRIES BACK TODAY!!( or tonight). I miss her a whole bunch:(
I also miss florida now im thinking of it. But I miss carrie more. I hope shes back earlier tonight so i can see her or else i wont be able to for another week

And braden got his license!! congrats ( even though you dont read this )
. Now all thats left is jess * shoots a glare in her direction *lol

anywho..heres another comic... enjoy

P.S. Everyone try the phili steak pizza at panago pizza, Its A- Freaking- Mazing

Sigmund

Ok. So i think i might be going back to camp on Sunday to go work on work crew. It depends if they call back tomorow or not. I hope I get in.

Im going to be at a wedding on saturday... hoorah.
Actually i think it will be kind of fun. Its outside and iv never been to an outdoor wedding. I hope its nice out, if its not im going to be very angry

Anyways..thats my small blurb and I am too lazy to think of a random story so ill just tell you a true one


The reason why i never write down any of my dreams anymore:
One morning i woke up and found a peice of paper, And written in half asleep chicken scratch was
"Rick Ruben and his 5 foot comb"
My initial reaction was ...what in the world... Then i thought who is this rick ruben charachter...so decided to google it and this is what i found:


# 1.....aaah thats a little creepy..apparantly hes a music producer...
#2 Why do i have no reccolection of this man or his 5 foot comb?. let alone this dream.. It seems i would have woken up screaming...but i guess not


im also gonna have ANOTHER new trend until the resources run out cause i lost my camera...but photography of the day ( or so )


This was taken in the field kind of behind the elementry school on some cut wheat around last year sometime. i dont really remember.

I disabled the comments on the post below.. cause some...blog spam? ( i didnt know there was such a thing ) i presume was being sent to me.
I dont know if its going to do it again but as for now. if you have comments on that praticular post just comment on this one

At Colins request...

Colin says this kind of humor has to be spread out the world so I am going to start putting my comics on here if I can manage to download hello.
I also used to write really weird stories/poems. So ill be posting one a-time i post.


So for today. Im going to put a normal one i wrote for art.

I wish life had background music

If Hollywood has taught me anything
It is to expect my days to be filled with background music
It would account for my tragically boring, soap opera of a life

Iv always wanted background music
It would play wherever i would go
Every moment would feel like a movie
There would be no reason to skip songs
For this is the soundtrack of your life

You would always know when something bad was going to happen
It would also make those exciting moments
That much more exciting
No more awkward silences
Just awkward beats
Silence would no longer be golden

Think if you could insert laugh tracks
To save you from your lame jokes
There would be songs for the sad times
Mad times, and even the glad times

But until that time comes
I'll just wear my headphones


Song reccomendaiton for the day : The Strokes - Under control
-----------------------------------------------
EDIT : turns out i didnt need to download hello...so heres the comic of the day


Shoot it scanned wonky...well its supposed to say this would be WAY cooler if i was wearing short shorts

So, I noticed there are alot of ladies in the crowd....


Yeah so I wrote half of this up and my computer decided to shut off. So here i go again


Me and Jess went to the ex today.
We got in line for the ferris wheel only to find out i needed to get my card traded in for a wrist band. why they wouldnt do that when you came in confuses me. so we hadta go in the ticket line twice.
Then when i got on the ferris wheel i sat in a puddle...hoorah

Then I think we went to go eat some greasy pizza and spudnuts and proceeded to the funhouse

There i got hit on by a freaky carnie who smelled of cabbage.
So he grabs my arm to scan my wristband..pulls me in closer and says. Hey, How YOU doin'
So all freaked out im like...uh...good. then walked away really fast

Nothing but clowns scares me more than carnies. seriosly. either overly skinny or overly overwieght men with cigarretes hanging out of their mouths . arms covered with tattoes staring at people as they go by " hey...wanna ride" and they stink of cabbage. I swear. That or sweat. Ew...*shudders*

ANYWAYS. off to line up for the Kalan Porter concert....an hour before the gates open... Were cool. So we met up with Travis and he proceded to tell us how cool we were until we got in. But in that time 3 people came up and talked to us
"your really going to see this concert"
"do you think your actually going to like it"
"why are you lined up so early"
and when we got in we had to wait for an hour and 45 minutes. we were on the floor and we could have waited for another 2 hours and still got the same spot. But it was fun.
I had the hiccups and Jess was getting annoyed she also pointed out I drank like 3 things in an hour.

So the concert starts and i swear. The screams were louder than the music. But he did suprisngly well. His band was freaking amazing. But me and Jess thought the guitar player was a chick...what...he was wearing pink and had hair longer than mine!...anyways Kalan is insane on the violin. my favorite was the devil went down to georgia. SO good.

But anyways. Half way through the concert hes like "So, i noticed there are alot of ladies in the crowd" So me and jess said to ourselves " No theres not! hes lieing! lets break his legs"
Then he said " is anyone out there single" And at that point i think my eardrums broke
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH IM SINGLE KALAN PICK ME!!
it was ...halarious to say in the least

So overall the concert was pretty good i had fun

Then the bus ride to the Roberts car...oh the bus ride...
Honestly. Why do the most surreal things happen to me on a bus.
So first we get there. Theres no driver. So we sit down anyways. She comes and takes off. seemingly really fast for a bus.
Then we proceed to drive down streets i dont recognize that felt like a speed we shouldnt be going. And i can hear a person on the radio in the background talking to the bus driver... i dont know why that was weird but trust me... it was
And a man farted...that was sick
so this ensues for a while until i hear a thump then i feel something wet on my face.
By now everyones looking around seeing what the heck it was. And i see green all over the place. then i see a fruit. Lying on the ground. Yes...somebody threw a fruit...into a bus....while we were driving....
So by now me and Jess are wanting to wake up and we drive into this empty parking lot. do a circle. Come out and stop at the bus stop
Me and Jess run to the car. and the surrealism doesnt stop. I look at jess and the way the light is hittting her it looks like a dream. And her parents...well were just surreal and i cant even explain it. it had to do with a cellphone though.
then we stopped at the post office....at 11 at night....
then finally i was home.

Thats it for my... weird...weird day sorry if it makes no sense whatsoever. i had fun

Sugar we're going down...

Today... i'll tell you what i dislike:

> People with a general blah-attitude about everything (ie. not passionate about anything)
> Back in the day (and still existent) when those tricky people come up from behind you, put their hands over your eyes and then says in a disguised voice, "guess who!"
> hearing birds chirp when it's bedtime
> Ignorant people
> People who dont have an open mind
> When people are really loud at like...2 Am
> When people forget to turn off their turn signal
> People who dont use their turn signal at all
> Small talk
> People who wear band shirts and dont even listen to that band
> Plastic wrappings on Cd's
> People who claim to be punk but they are really not, and its obviose
> Elvis impersonaters and the people who pay to see them
> Rap "music"
> People who carry around skateboards and dont even use them
> Repetative songs
> When the radio starts fuzzing and losing reception and the driver doesnt change the station
> People who lip sync in concerts
> People who try to act and look rebellious ( kinda falls in with punk )
> Thin guitar picks
> Being the last person to find out about literally everything possible in my family



Man i have alot of dislikes... I need a life. lol


Nicole

01. Comment with your name, and I will write something about you.
02. I will then tell what song/movie reminds me of you.
03. I will try to name a single word that best describes you.
04. I'll tell you the most memorable moment I've had with you.
05. Then I'll tell you my silliest memory of you.
06. I will tell you what animal you remind me of.
07. I'll then tell you something that I've always wondered about you.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------

1. Nicole is a great person who is younger than me. ha.
anyways. shes great and crazy and i love her. i wish we could hang out more your crazy

2. Movie - Thirteen ( because i saw it with you )
Song - Lover i dont have to love - Bright eyes

3. Outgoing

4. Visiting that creepy gas station haha

5. Hahaha...Backstreet boys + inflatable matresses + videocameras = halarious

6. A cat...i dont know why

7. Why we dont hang out more...but thats...not so much about you so...why...you...i dont know

Jess

01. Comment with your name, and I will write something about you.
02. I will then tell what song/movie reminds me of you.
03. I will try to name a single word that best describes you.
04. I'll tell you the most memorable moment I've had with you.
05. Then I'll tell you my silliest memory of you.
06. I will tell you what animal you remind me of.
07. I'll then tell you something that I've always wondered about you.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------
1. Jess is a girl who is my age ( older in fact ) and is one of my very best friends. We have alot of things in common including our musical and movie taste. Thats basically all we do when we hang out anyways. she is one tubular gal *hang ten*

2. Movie : Donnie Darko
Song: Any Whitestripes song basically

3. Different ( in a good way )

4. Probably in carries living room when I was doing dancing Jan. Or when you told me you were going to get baptized

5. When we made up how Im going to pick up guys.

6. A giraffe. Because you like them...and i got you one in florida... a stuffed one

7. What kind of guy you are gonna end up with because you like very diffrent ones

I dont get it

A MUSICAL BATON

Total volume of music files on my computer:Too much as jess said...wait..not too much. NEVER too much. But in other words. i dont know

last CD I bought was: You know.. i dont really remember i think it was autumn tides or something

Song playing right now: First day of my life - Bright eyes

Five songs I listen to a lot, or that mean a lot to me:
Is this what they call love - The Thills
Waste of paint - Bright eyes
First day of my life - Bright eyes
Gel- Collective soul
Another travelling song - Bright eyes

Five people to whom I'm passing the baton:
Nicole
Janelle
Christine
Ally
Teri

-----01. Comment with your name, and I will write something about you.
02. I will then tell what song/movie reminds me of you.
03. I will try to name a single word that best describes you.
04. I'll tell you the most memorable moment I've had with you.
05. Then I'll tell you my silliest memory of you.
06. I will tell you what animal you remind me of.
07. I'll then tell you something that I've always wondered about you.
08. Put this in your blog.




----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Well that was remotly confusing. But thats alright

So i just got in from a family gathering. Meeting my cousins wife and kid.
It was ALOT more fun then i expected.
I met this girl that is honestly exactly like me. she even says "your face"
everyones like. man i cant even tell you two apart. and her dad was hilarious.
" if i ever made a microwave commerical it would be like..."when would YOU like to eat? Today? Tomorow? SUPER TURBO MICROWAVE-O-MATIC!!! get one now"

but yeah..im home...*waves*